Categories
#coronageddon #SelfIsolationShenanigans Anthologies book discussions Holiday Horror Horror Short Story splatterpunk

Celebrating National Metal Day!

Heavy Metal & Horror – A Match Made For Screaming!

Celebrating National Metal Day by watching horror movies is easy. It’s FUN, but the hardest part will be deciding what movie to watch FIRST. If you’re in a state where you’re still strongly encouraged to stay self-isolated, picking up a book and getting lost in a blend of music & madness sounds much more appealing! But – what to read? Here are a few choices…


We’ll be celebrating doubly hard since The Dark Defender & I Joined Forces nine years ago today.

Joined Forces 11/11/11

If you don’t already have THE SCREAM by John Skipp & Craig Spector then this is the book you should pick up and start reading today. It’s HORROR. It’s SPLATTERPUNK. It’s ROCK AND ROLL.

Rock ‘n’ Roll. Hell. Two great tastes that taste great together. Long before Elvis gyrated on the Sullivan Show or the Beatles toiled the smoky red-light bars of Hamburg, music has been sowing the seeds of liberation. Or damnation. With each new generation the edge of rebellion pushed farther. Rhythms quickened. Volume increased. Lyrics coarsened. The rules continued to be broken, until it seemed that there were no rules at all.
And as waves of teens cranked it up and poured it on, parents built walls of accusation to explain their offspring’s seeming corruption. Sex and drugs, demon worship and violence are the effects. Music is the cause. Or so the self-styled guardians of morality would have us believe.
Meet The Scream. Just your average everyday mega-cult band. Their music is otherworldly. Their words are disturbing. Their message is unholy. Their fans are legion. And they’re not kidding. They’re killing. Themselves. Each other. Everyone. Their gospel screams from the lips of babes. Their backbeat has a body count. And their encore is just the warm-up act to madness beyond belief.
It emerged from a war-torn jungle, where insanity was just another word for survival. It arrived in America with an insatiable lust for power and the means to fulfill it. In the amplified roar of arena applause there beats the heart of absolute darkness
.


As your punk rock horror hostess in this event, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to show you this ‘battle’ anthology!

• Thirteen Rounds. • Twenty Six Stories. • No Holds Barred.

Grab your guitars, turn the volume to eleven, and launch yourself into a world where heavy music rules over all!

Your teammates we will include 13 of these authors as you battle head to head for the Ultimate Title! David Owain Huges, Michelle Garza and Melissa Lawson – The Sisters of Slaughter, James H. Longmire, Dani Brown, Robert Holy, Andrew Freudenberg, Easel Pratt, Kitty Kane, Sebastian Crow, J.L. Lane, G.H. Finn, Jason Morton, Brian Barr, Michael Noe, Jim Richardson, Seth Moore, R.E. Lyons, Toneye Tyenot, William Bradley, John P. Collins Jr., Lucretia Stanhope, Brian Glossup, K. Trap Jones, Michael Fischer, and Jim Golforth.


I love the vibe happening right now, so the 3rd place tie between THE RITUAL by Adam Neville and SHOCK ROCK edited by Jeff Gelb has just been broken! ROCK AND ROLL IS HERE TO SLAY …

The stars of shock fiction know what metalheads & moralists, punksters & preachers have known all along. Rock and roll. With its hot licks and raw glitter, has a dark side too – where the party stops and the terror begins.

Put on your headphones. Open this electrifying book. Rock to the world of horror where martyred musical super-legends return from the dead at 120 decibels… where radio stations sponsor ghastly giveaways that no living soul could want … where other-earthly pirates bootleg not records, but human souls… where people are strange … and the devil rocks all night.

THE NEW SOUND OF HORROR comes from Stephen King, F. Paul Wilson, David J. Schow, Nancy A. Collins, Ronald Kelly, Don D’Ammassa, Graham Masterton, Paul Dale Anderson, Michael E. Garrett, Brian J. Hodge, R Patrick Gates, Rex Miller, Bill Mumy & Peter David,R Richard Christian Matheson, Michael Newton, Mark Verheiden, Ray Garton, John L. Byrne, Thomas Tessier, and John Shirley.

Categories
31 Days Of Halloween Anthologies Free Horror

Happy Halloween From Matt Drabble

Did you miss any of the the AFTER DARKNESS FALLS anthologies? Then now’s your time to catch up! Here’s what Matt says…

“Tis the season to be scary. For all of you out there who like to curl up by the fire and read something spooky by the dancing light here’s a FREE offer for you. You can now pick up my After Darkness Falls anthology collection for free via Amazon. That’s 30 tales of terror & the macabre all with a wicked twist in the tale. Available free from Thurs 29th Oct – Mon 2nd Nov.

Author Matt Drabble

Download: Amazon US, Amazon UK,
Website: mattdrabble.com
Twitter: MattDrabble01
Facebook: matt.drabble.3

“Also if you haven’t picked up a copy yet “CAPES” is out now, a Horror/ Thriller/ Mystery set within a realistic dark superhero universe.”

— Matt Drabble

Categories
31 Days Of Halloween Anthologies Free

Darkness & Evil for FREE

Tap Cover To Get Yours!

Dark Places, Evil Faces is Volume 2 in this Horror and Dark Suspense anthology series. Including works of fiction by Clive Barker, Ramsey Campbell, Graham Masterton, Joe R. Lansdale, Jack Ketchum and many more. All the proceeds raised from the sale of this book will be donated to Rethink Mental Illness.

All of the authors included are MARK LUMBY (Author), Clive Barker (Author), Joe R Lansdale (Author), Ramsey Campbell (Author), Graham Masterton (Author), Jack Ketchum (Author), Stephen Laws (Author), Matt Hickman (Author), Mark Cassell  (Author), Terry GrimwooD (Author), Mike Duke  (Author), Kenneth Goldman (Author), Brian Knight (Author), Lisa Vasquez  (Author), David Owain Hughes  (Author), Ryan Harville  (Author), Pippa Bailey  (Author), Dale Robertson  (Author), Lex H. Jones  (Author), CH Baum (Author), Joe X. Young  (Author), Vincent V Cava  (Author), Veronica Smith  (Author), Lisa Lee Tone (Editor) 

Categories
Anthologies book discussions Book Reviews Horror horrotica

Mashed : The Culinary Delights of Twisted Erotic Horror

Intended for mature audiences.

This book isn’t for everyone, if you’re easily offended or closed-minded skip this, but if you like your horror stories to leave you steam rising off your skin you should grab your copy today!

Scoop Up MASHED on Amazon

This book is ONLY for the TWISTED!

MASHED is what happens when your favorite cooking show falls into The Twilight Zone! Add a pinch of sex, a dash of humor and a whole lotta horror and you’ve got a recipe for the most TWISTED Anthology out there!

The 17 Sensually Sinister Stories include –

A Woman’s Corn – Two clandestine lovers with more secrets than either of them knew, brings about a special witches brew while the devil stews.
By J. Donnait

Charlies Chunky Munching Meat – A tale of obsession over a certain pink meat, gone too far.
By Stephen McQuiggan

Halloween Nosh – Two old-world vampires celebrating their love during the holidays with a special feast in the dungeon.
By Brandon Ketchum

Biscuit : A Love Story – A baker’s dreams destroyed by a homeless man with unnatural hungers, leads to super-natural revenge.
By Grivante

Burnt Scrambled Eggs – What happens when your succubus lover stays over for breakfast?
By Devon Widmer

The Disagreeable Dinner – Ever eaten a bad meal? Not like this one. Join us for this strange and hilarious case of food poisoning
By Mark Daponte

Sugar – Honey is sweet, but when a potential sugar daddy turns out to be one of her high school teachers, a night of planned BDSM fun ends in a most unsavory of ways.
By Darla Dimmelle

The Henry Problem – Fruit as an aphrodisiac, exorcisms for dummies? All that and more!
By John Grey

Nibble, Nibble, My Wolf – It’s all the rage to reimagine fairy tales these days and this story gets it right in the most beautifully twisted and erotic way.
By J.L. Boekestein

The Wrath of the Buttery Bastard Taters – GMO’s are out of hand. A couples romantic dinner turns into a nightmare when their frankenfood decides to eat them instead.
By Alex Colvin

Sauce – When cooking lessons lead to a new fetish, narcissistic Bart, takes self-satisfaction to a new level.
By Steven Carr

The Care and Feeding of your Personal Demon – Be careful what you wish for. Sometimes, asking for a little help from down below can come with a lifetime of demented and hilarious torment.
By Maxine Kollar

P.A.C.D. The Kitchen of Tomorrow, Today! – Advancements in technology are often quickly perverted for sexual experimentation. Find out what happens when a couple’s cooling romance heats back up with a new kitchen appliance.
By R.A. Goli

Arabica – Do you like coffee? Maybe a little too much? Here’s a tale of a woman using BDSM aversion therapy to overcome her caffeine addiction.
By Cobalt Jade

Toilet Manners – Marital impropriety leads to the strangest meal of a man’s life after a visit to a glory hole inside a fancy french restaurant.
By Eddie Generous

The Stray – Is the story of a man’s lifelong dedication to helping strays. But, what happens when one gets a little upset when he announces he is moving away.
By Calypso Kane

The Old Man in the Suit – Voodoo and baked goods outside a lesbian bar during Mardi Gras.
By Nicholas Paschall

I need to check out more work from all the authors included in MASHED!

While I loved just about every story here, I think that my top 5 stand-outs are…
1.) “P.A.C.D. THE KITCHEN OF TOMORROW, TODAY!” By R.A. Goli
2.) “BISCUIT: A LOVE STORY” By Grivante
3.) “THE CARE & FEEDING OF YOUR PERSONAL DEMON” By Maxine Kollar
4.) “THE STRAY” By Calypso Kane
And #5 is a tie between “SAUCE” By Steve Carr, and “THE DISAGREEABLE DINNER” By Mark Daponte

Pick up your copy of Mashed : The Culinary Delights of Twisted Erotic Horror on Amazon… then dig in and enjoy the dark depravity!

Have you read this one already? Which one was your favorite? Until next time, loves… stay safe, and stay scary – not scared!

P, L & N💋

~sg

Categories
Anthologies Book Reviews coming soon Horror Horror New Release

Tales From The Dark Web by J.T. Withelder

TalesFrom-1587404941
Publication Date: May 7th, 2020

Pre-Order on Amazon now!

 

Burial:
Allen has made some mistakes in his life, and they’re coming back to haunt him! Unfortunately…he keeps making them while trying to keep the old one buried!
This had me on the edge of my seat, and yelling – out loud – at Allen.

Smart:
At first I didn’t understand why Adderall wasn’t the drug of choice for this story – it’s exactly what Andy needs.
Now I understand why the author chose the nootropics with the blood root.

Gambler:
Charlie found a sure fire way to cure his gambling addiction. I don’t believe Don will ever place another bet in his life now, either.

Delivery:
Zach works delivering food for an app similar to ‘Door Dash’. He picks up your order from one of the multiple participating restaurants, and brings it right to your door.
A minor fender bender on his way to a delivery starts a chain of events that put more that his job in jeopardy.
This is a great, and very original short story!
Side note: I wish there was a similar app for getting cigarettes, beer, and whatever else my lazy ass doesn’t want to leave the house for!

Cure:
“Life is not worth living without a little bit of risk.”
Could it be considered Stockholm Syndrome if it’s a doctor holding your psyche hostage, instead of a kidnapper holding your body hostage?
Ooo… how about Munchausen By-Proxy By Psychotic Physician?!
“Now…how does that make you feel?”

This is the first book I’ve read by J.T. Withelder, and I am looking forward to reading more.
His work is fresh, and fast-paced!

Connect with J.T. Withelder on Twitter, Facebook, Goodreads, and Amazon

Categories
Anthologies Book Reviews Extreme Horror Horror Series

#HORRIBLE

 

41BYr8kfVlL
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐/⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This is a horrible collection of horrible stories about horrible people, perhaps even for horrible people.” ~KJ Moore

I enjoyed reading #HORRIBLE, the second issue in BloodBoundBooks’ RED LINE series.
Does that make me horrible? Who’s to say?
The author drags you through some unpleasant places, and makes you THINK – how can that be a bad thing?

A bit about the stories…

LAST:
I love this one. I put the book down because I really started to think about the different people… Maybe I’m a bit more twisted than some, cuz I think I’d like to sit and people-watch at this point, too

BONBON HOUSE:
I never thought about how this could be a viable source of income for certain individuals, or how fucked up it is when you think about it for more than a minute!
The mental torture that they must endure… wow …

WHITE OUT:
I feel like I’ve read this one before, but not sure when or where.
*(Update: it was in the first volume of the D.O.A. Extreme Horror Anthology)
It made me feel claustrophobic.
It’s funny how most people, myself included, value the lives of animals over most humans.

PROVOKE:
Hmmm. I suppose that kids don’t really understand how wrong certain things are – but most kids don’t have these feelings, do they? I’m not sure.
Good story telling got me in the right head space, but I still don’t know if he’s just a very lonely & confused little boy, or something much darker.

NANCY DREW:
Not sure what to make of this yet. I have to chew on it for a bit longer.

(UNSPEAKABLE):
Angie, not exactly ‘boys will be boys’ material, is it?
Judy, think a little harder and/or longer when it comes to your mom, huh?
And, well, Courtney… If vibrators killed spiders, we wouldn’t need men at all now would we?

GRIM:
I wonder… If ‘Death’ wanted to find/have/keep love, could s/he?
It’s a heartbreaking thought, so an existential crisis might be a lighter topic to dwell on.

* I especially like the “self-inflicted stupidity” sentence 😉

SNIP:
Bypass my squeamishness you say… 😶
::stillshivering::

X SKIPPING Y:
Best beginning sentence ever.
Ishmael can suck it!

CHEESE:
Well. That was disturbing.

THE BLUE SCHNOOKLYBOB:
I’m not going to try to play the scholar, and say that this story’s ‘symbolism is clearly a statement about the blah blah & bullshit in today’s society…’
And, honestly, I’m usually not into sci-fi, but I enjoyed this short.
I’m still giggling about how we, as humans, have better profanity, and our bitching is top notch!
BTW – I want a schnooklybob. A pink one, not a blue one.

TASTELESS:
WARNING:
“THERE IS NO SAFE-WORD”.
RE-READ THE INTRODUCTION TO THIS BOOK.
KNOW THE DEFINITION OF TRANSGRESSIVE HORROR.
READ THE #RULES.
THEN READ THE FORWARNING BEFORE THIS STORY.

A review? I just can’t.
I needed to nope out at the second page, but I forced myself to read every word, with tears streaming down my face. Why? Because I used to know a woman who’s story is quite similar. The woman was not involved, the man was the birth father, and the infant (don’t judge me) thankfully did not survive. Like the author states in the forewarning, the physical logistics were too much for me to even try to comprehend.
I read it for Nevaeh.

 

Categories
Anthologies Extreme Horror Holiday Horror Horror

Need An Earth Day Read?

Celebrate #EarthDay 🌎 with a creepy twist! Check out Leslie Connor’s short story ‘I ♥ RECYCLING‘ in A HACKED-UP HOLIDAY MASSACRE.

13060654
The last place Matt wants to be is in the woods, with his family, just because his step-dad wants to plant a tree for Earth Day. But this Earth Day awakens something evil in these woods, and Matt doesn’t know if he, or his family, will make it out alive.

Categories
Anthologies Book Reviews Horror

DOA III: Extreme Horror Anthology

51lVzpF0IyL
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

After six years and more than fifty authors, the Unholy Trinity is complete. This third installment in the DOA series offers thirty stories from the originators of splatterpunk as well as the newest voices in extreme horror.

You’ll laugh…you’ll cry…you’ll vomit
Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

Stories from Bentley Little -Jack Ketchum & Edward Lee – Shane Mckenzie – Wrath James White – Richard Christian Matheson – Kristopher Triana – T.M. McLean – Sean Eads & Joshua Viola – T. Fox Dunham – John Skipp – Luciano Marano – Ryan Harding – Kristopher Rufty – Daniel I. Russell – LLoyd Kaufman & Lily Hayes Kaufman – David Sandner – Betty Rocksteady – C.M. Saunders – K. Trap Jones – Hal Bodner – Adrian Ludens – C. Cameron Rossi – Alistair Rennie – Airika Sneve – Christoph Weber – Garrett Cook – Eric J. Guignard – Jeff Strand – Jaap Boekestein – John McNee

NOTCHES by Sean Eads and Joshua Viola
How do you keep track of things? A notch on your bedpost? A notch on your arm?
How do you keep track of things you have lost?

BROKEN HEARTED by T. Fox Dunham
💔 💻 The Perfect Couple. It’s not just a saying, or a wish, thanks to No More Broken Hearts, Inc. 100% perfectly compatible couples world wide – no fighting, no bullshit. What could possibly go wrong?

N WORD by Shane McKenzie
⚰️ 🛀 🤢 Calvin was a regular, horny kid. But he should have thought about that fantasy for a little while longer. No patience these days.

SKIPP’S SPLATTERPUNK ALPHABET SOUFFLE by John Skipp
I don’t normally pick anthology favorites, I try to just hit on each story.
But…SKIPP’S SPLATTERPUNK ALPHABET SOUFFLE is one that should be on everyone’s ‘Must Read’ list.

TAKEAWAY NIGHT by T.M. McLean
💩 I can barely read about emetophilia and/or coprophilia without gagging, and this was tough for a minute. But, I got a chuckle, too. 🤢

BURNT by Luciano Marano
🔥 Vicki is driven by the burn. By the beauty of it. And she just wants her world to be a beautiful place to live. “Burn wards are Satan’s art gallery“.

JUNK by Ryan Harding
🤢 🔪 ☢️ A Viral Virus ss – jam packed with cringe inducing imagery, hilariously grotesque metaphors, and hyperbole for days 😝
My Ryan Harding books look like rainbows; full of highlighted words & phrases that I never want to forget, but sadly cannot seem to slip into every day conversations.

THE PACKAGE by Kristopher Rufty
📦 We all want to do the right thing, love the neighbor and all that. But when your inner freak-tard detector starts binking red, listen to your inner voice. Call me a cunt, but I’ll still be alive!

RED by Richard Christian Matheson
I need to thank this brilliant mind that gave me “Three O’clock High”, (as well as many stories that I’ve loved, but didn’t realize who the author was  😕)

8 OUT OF 10 by Daniel I. Russell
😼 A battle of wills between a mother and her son. 😾

THE MACHINE by Bentley Little
If you think hard enough, you can use anything to jerk off with. But finding out that your dirty little thingamajig was made to be exactly that… it kinda takes some of the romance out of it.

POSTHUMOUS by Lloyd Kaufman & Lily Hays Kaufman
It’s all about your social media followers – don’t pretend like it’s not.

BURY THEM DEEPER by David Sandner
👹 Learning that monsters are human can break your psyche as a kid.

THESE BEAUTIFUL BONES by Betty Rocksteady
💔 🔨 When your girl is coming at you with a hammer in her hand… Do not call her by the wrong name. JS

SUBJECT #270374 by C.M. SAUNDERS
🏥 🚬 🗞️ Deep thoughts & dry humor 💉 🔪
I need to pay more attention to this author.

BEER BATTERED by K. Trap Jones
Deliverence meets Bigfoot – with buddies & beer! 🍺

L’AMUSE BOUCHE by Hal Bodner
Joel considers himself a 9.5/10 on the hotness scale, Why settle for just one guy when there are so many to amuse the mouth? Besides, his dates don’t always walk away as pretty as they were going in…

PROUD PAPA by Adrian Ludens
🍼 As a parent, I can attest to watching my spawn grow up over night. There’s never enough time. The proud papa in this ss doesn’t miss a second.

CRY THE BANSHEE by C. Cameron Rossi
Add another #MichiganMadman to our list!  This madman lives in the urban wilds of Detroit, Michigan – maybe we’ve already crossed paths.

TERRORSLUTS FOR ETERNITY VERSUS THE UNGODHEADS OF THE INTERDIMENSIONALS by Alistair Rennie
👾 This is a little more sci-fi than I’d normally read, but I got into the story. If you know me, that says a lot.

WE BELIEVE IN 5B by Airika Sneve
🥒 🍆 🍌 🌋 An in-house seminar in ‘Unconventional Leadership’. Why do guys go batshit overboard when they are with other ‘bros’?

TAKING ROOT by Christoph Weber
🌿🌱 It may be the end of times, but thank Christ there weren’t any zombies! The couple in this is know how to survive – by any means necessary.

THE BLISS POINT by Wrath James White
⛪ 🍆 OMFG. There’s something wrong with me. 🌋

WOEFUL CITY by Garrett Cook
Leave your hope behind if you’d enter here”.

RITCHIE by Eric J. Guignard
A duel that lasts more than a lifetime will surely bring some crazy with it at some point in time. But, who’s to say WHAT is crazy?

I’D GIVE ANYTHING FOR YOU by Jack Ketchum and Edward Lee.
How To Lose A Guy In Three Weeks. Sorta.
💍 💔 ‘IGAFY‘ has been published prior to this anthology, but I enjoyed reading again.⛓️ 🔒

HOSTILE by Jeff Strand
💸 🔪 I always look forward to Jeff’s sense of humor – in all it’s flavors.

“…that’s a mentally ill thing to do. That’s for somebody who drools and wears necklaces made out of body parts. I don’t wear necklaces made out of body parts, I will never wear necklaces made out of body parts, and I don’t appreciate you trying to make me feel guilty about not wearing necklaces made out of body parts.”

METAL HEAT by Jaap Boekestein
A fetish can consume your time, but when it becomes YOU… that’s trouble.

REPULSIVE GLAMOUR by John McNee
A drug. A transformation, if you’re one of the lucky ones. A very painful death if your not.
Pssst… Hey, John… ‘Degredatia’ is the best character name ever!

THE BITCH by Kristopher Triana
🔗 This is a tale of terror and revenge, (with some new and interesting forms of brutality!). It also had a couple of twisty turns that took me by surprise! I’ll definately be looking into more work from this author, The Detained is on my Must Read list now (I remember getting BODY ART, and I need to get it in que!) I had to giggle a bit when I read the author bio and learned what Kristopher Triana does for a living, when he’s not writing that is. I have two more books on my Must Read list now, too! 🗜️

* A PERSONAL NOTE TO KRISTOPHER TRIANA:
I’d be very excited to see the New & Improved Emma taken further. Her recently acquired ‘treasure’ is a story begging to be told as well!

BizarroCentral

BloodBoundBooks

Categories
Anthologies book discussions Book Reviews Horror

VS: US vs. UK Horror

LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!

A BATTLE ROYALE OF US AND UK
INDIE HORROR HEAVYWEIGHTS!

vs. cover

Who writes the best horror: the US or the UK?

Find out for yourself in VS: US vs UK, a competition anthology featuring some of the year’s best horror, judged by horror enthusiasts and us: the readers. DON’T FORGET TO CAST YOUR VOTE!

 

The Contenders…

Duncan Ralston vs Rich Hawkins 
James Ward Kirk vs Kit Power
Glenn Rolfe vs Lex H. Jones
Tim Miller vs Daniel I. Russel
John Ledger vs Jim Goforth
Essel Pratt vs Daniel Marc Chant
Thomas S. Flowers vs Kyle M. Scott
Jonathan Ondrashek vs David Owain Hughes
T.S. Woolard vs Toneye Eyenot
Michael Noe vs Dani Brown
Sisters of Slaughter vs Matt Hickman
Salome Jones vs Kitty Kane
Peter Oliver Wonder vs Kevin J Kennedy

This was so much fun to read!
And – you could feel that everyone was having fun while putting this book together, that shines through.
As for the winners… I tended to agree with the other judges, for the most part –  I’m not going to say which stories, or authors that I voted for – you should read this collection, and make up your own mind!

Peace, Love & Necrophilia ♥
 ~ sg

All proceeds from the purchase of this book will be donated to the Second Chance Center for Animals (US) and the West Wales Poundies Dog Rescue (UK) charities.

 

 

Categories
Anthologies book discussions Book Reviews Dark Humor Extreme Horror Holiday Horror Horror Shenanigans

A BLAST FROM THE PAST! Revisiting A VERY STRANGEHOUSE CHRISTMAS

* originally published for the 2013 Holiday Horror Binge & Purge event on DECEMBER 29, 2013

I’ve completed my [Goodreads] ˙·٠•●♥ 2013 Reading Challenge ♥●•٠·˙ – (ahead of schedule, and beyond my personal goal – go, me!) But, I’m still sitting here wishing I had read so much more! I need more time! More hours in the day, more days in the week… UGH! It’s so frustrating!
I started reading titles from StrangeHouse Books in 2013, and I wish I could say that I’m ending this year all caught up, that I’ve devoured them all quicker than a Cannibal in Fat Camp! ::sigh:: That, however, is not the case. But, it gives me a goal for 2014!!

19322026
A Very StrangeHouse Christmas

“This collection of 9 twisted tales of Christmas horror brings together weirdo literary talent from around the world, all with the sole purpose of turning the most sacred of holidays on its head, and making sweet, sweet love to its defenseless ear holes!”

“Join SHB ring leader Kevin Strange, as well as StrangeHouse anthology alumni Rich Bottles Jr., Jesse Wheeler, KM Tepe, and newcomers like Lindsey Goddard and MP Johnson on this sometimes magical, always fucked up journey to the north pole. We promise you’ll never look at Christmas the same way ever again!”

For last year’s ‘HOLIDAY HORROR BINGE & PURGE’ event, my main Holiday book to read, and review, was A HACKED-UP HOLIDAY MASSACRE. (It turned out to be a book of all holidays, not just Christmas, but ‘Irreverent Merriment, Diabolical Debauchery, and Gory Good Times‘ were had by all!!) Hacked Up HOLIDAY This year, I started earlier and got to fit in many more books from my holiday horror wish list. Two of this year’s reads are fighting for the top spot on my Happy List – A Very StrangeHouse Christmas is one of the two.

INTRODUCTION:  Kevin Strange

Kafka’s Run by Billy Tea:
The Kafka’s are Gift Heads & they’re in the run. Gift Heads are a slave race to the fat man. Raised in prison camps, tended to by elves, and eventually beheaded when they reach maturity. Their severed gift-heads are offered as sacrifice to appease the tiny Earth Gods. Fantastic story.
KafkasRun

Do Not Buy by MP Johnson:
A ‘Tickle This’ kind of story! Quick, gross, and wonderful!
ElmoAboutToGETTickled

The Unlisted by Jesse Wheeler:
YOU WANT NAUGHTY? You got it with this story! Sex, debauchery, violence, & more!

Image from the security camera in the Women's Plus Size dressing rooms
Image from the security camera in the Women’s Plus Size dressing rooms

Things in here had me cracking up (in between a gag, or a cringe) – one hilarious fact about these elves… they shit the cookie dough that Mrs. Claus bakes for Santa. When TSHTF, there’s a line about an elf who got so scared “he nearly nogged his pants”!! (It makes perfect sense that they pee egg nog, if they shit dough, right?!) WARM & FRESH!

Dear Santa Claus by K.M. Tepe:
A letter to Santa from the Naughty K.M. Tepe – If I were the fat man, I’d make sure every item on that list was specially delivered with added bows made of cash…

Think twice before leaving me coal again, ya Prick!!
Think twice before leaving me coal again, ya Prick!!

*Message for K.M. Tepe:
Ever since I opened up my very first MySpace account, I’ve used the same line in the About Me section of practically every account – still using it today.
After reading your bio in the back of this book, I just wanted to make a note of it just in case you see it yourself somewhere. There’s no “This town ain’t big enough fir the both of us” reasoning or mentality behind this note – It’s more like a brunch invitation! If you’re ever in Detroit, look me up… we can hang out in the alley behind Poetry Slam, guzzling coffee, and poking the corpse of Wino Willie!

Blood On The Highway by Lindsey Goddard:
The anguish of a mother’s loss is not bound by species.
A woman, her husband, and his brother are driving through a terrible storm, on they’re way for what was supposed to be a relaxing holiday. This is a very good SS! I’m hoping that Lindsey sees this and can recommend a better pic – one that looks like the inside of her brain!

This is an image that I found on a Google Image Search - It does not reflect the authors imagery in any way
*This is an image that I found on a Google Image Search – It does not reflect the authors imagery in any way

Kathi the Sexy Elf by Rich Bottles Jr.:
A department store Santa, who is following in his dad’s footprints as the jolly fat man for the same store, decides to do something remarkably sweet for his ‘Helper’ this year. The helper, Kathi, makes a very sexy elf, and she has some surprises of her own in store for Santa…
images-4-1
I can’t wait to read some of the stories in Rich’s ‘humorrorotica‘ genre! Some links are provided at the bottom.

Christmas with the Family by Jonathan Byrd:
This one should be called “A FUCKED UP FAMILY CHRISTMAS”.
Other Jonathan Byrd titles on Amazon include –
BIG, The Jar, UNSHACKLED, and The Mommies Club. But, after reading this short, I’m not entirely convinced that it’s the same guy!! 🙂

The Witch who Fucked Christmas by Kevin Strange:
This story is a tie in to one of Kev’s movies, but it stands alone just fine.
Set in STRANGEVILLE, ILLINOIS, a worn out & broke down Santa is about to go head to head with The Hag of Horrors herself – Sasparilla, The Weed Witch. The victor will hold the bag that contains all the magic of Christmas. But, you can’t expect the Hag of Horrors to play fair… can you?
Nixon and Hogan Smoke Christmas YouTube trailer
Hack Films / Kevin Strange on YouTube

I’m Dreaming of a White Doomsday by Mike Lombardo:
Save the best for last, Kev? Yeah. I’m going to get this review posted, then go slit my wrists. xxoo 

After Notes, Links, & Other Randomly Strange[House] Fun

I’ve been adding and updating this section since the original post, and I’m still not finished.
I would like to include as much info as possible for each author that is/was involved with SHB while the books below were published.
This section will eventually become a StrangeHouse Spotlight Page
**If YOU are one of those authors, please – contact me! I’d like to post any info/links that you would like fans to know about!!***

Check out the StrangeHouseBooks blog on WordPress
‘LIKE’ StrangeHouseBooks on Facebook

A VERY STRANGEHOUSE CHRISTMAS on Goodreads
Kevin Strange on Goodreads
K.M. Tepe on Goodreads
Rich Bottles Jr. on Goodreads
Mike Lombardo on Goodreads
Lindsey Goddard on Goodreads
Jesse Wheeler on Goodreads
Billy Tea on Goodreads
M.P. Johnson on Goodreads
Jonathan Byrd on Goodreads

DO YOU THINK YOU KNOW KEVIN STRANGE?
Take this quiz and find out!! Post your results in the comments, I’d love to see them – I’ll Make sure that I get a link to Kevin, so he can see your results, too!

MORE SHB ANTHOLOGIES – GET SOME STRANGE!
The Last Gig On Planet Earth And Other Strange Stories
Strange Sex
Strange Versus Lovecraft
Tales of Questionable Taste
Zombie! Zombie! Brain Bang!
Scary Fucking Stories: A Strange Collection

VOYEURISM, in 140 characters or less –
@_StrangeHouse
@kevinthestrange
@freaktension
@BillyTea_AMDAD
@tusitalabruni
@SFerrariFOS

Other Books from Rich Bottles Jr.
LUMBERJACKED
“[…] makes Deliverance look like a family raft trip down the Lower Gauley”
Hellhole West Virginia
“Eco-friendly vampires, beach-yearning zombies and sex-starved she-devils.”
The Manacled
“What happens when twin brothers lease out the former West Virginia State Penitentiary with the false purpose of filming a documentary on supernatural phenomena, but their true intention is to make a pornographic movie? Chaos ensues as the disturbed spirits of murdered convicts, along with the reanimated dead from the neighboring Indian Burial Mound, take their vengeance on the unwary and undressed trespassers. Zombies, ghosts, mobsters and porn collide in this bizarro tale from horror author Rich Bottles Jr.”
*I HAVE TO GET THIS BOOK!* (Update – Rich sent me a copy of this, along with some awesome author swag! Thanks, Rich!!)

Check out ‘Gross-Out Author’ Jesse Wheeler’s Dinner at the Vomitropolis – I have this, but haven’t had the nerve to start reading it yet.

The Big Book of Bizarro
The Big Book of Bizarro Erotica Collection
The Big Book of Bizarro Horror Collection
The Big Book of Bizarro Sci-Fi & Fantasy Collection

titlebar2
Visit the official website of Mike Lombardo’s Reel Splatter Productions! They’re a small independent horror-comedy troupe based out of Lancaster, Pennsylvania whose goal is to prove artistic expression can involve necrophilia & chainsaws! Visit RSP now, and see some horrible monstrosities commit unspeakable acts! YAY!!

http://www.ReelSplatter.com | Facebook.com/ReelSplatter

Writer/Director/FX Artist and author of this book’s SS titled I’M DREAMING OF A WHITE DOOMSDAY – Mike “Dr.Chud” Lombardo just released THE STALL on DVD and it is ready to ship!
It’s the story of a young pizza shop employee whi finds himself trapped in a public restroom during the Lovecraftian apocalypse. The DVD contains buckets of exclusive bloody extras that aren’t available on YouTube.

A Hacked-Up Holiday Massacre: Halloween is Going to be Jealous on Amazon

A Very StrangeHouse Christmas on Amazon